What is Success, Anyway?

“Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.” – Albert Schweitzer

One of the most common struggles I see with clients is how they define success. More often than not, their measurements rely on external factors—things largely out of their control. Making a sale, receiving praise, or checking off a long to-do list are common ways people determine whether their day was “successful.”

In recent years, I’ve witnessed several people navigate the final stages of life. Watching that process has profoundly shifted my perspective. It’s made me reflect more deeply on what it truly means to live a successful life—or even just have a successful day.

What I’ve come to realize is this: success isn’t about how much we earn, how productive we are, or whether someone else approves of us. In our fast-paced culture, we often get so caught up in doing that we forget to simply be.

Just last night, I had a conversation with a friend who had spent the day discussing the concept of wealth—a term we often associate with success. Each person in the conversation was asked, “What does wealth mean to you?” For some, it was strictly financial: a specific dollar amount in assets and steady monthly income. Others expanded the definition to include good health, meaningful relationships, and inner peace. But what struck me most was how few could clearly define what wealth really meant for them.

In much the same way, most people struggle to define success. I believe one reason for this is our habit of looking outside ourselves for validation. But what if we flipped the script and started looking inward instead?

Barbara DeAngelis offers a powerful perspective in her book Secrets About Life Every Woman Should Know. She writes:

“Instead of defining your success by what you have achieved or acquired, why not begin defining your success by how much you are growing each day?”

She even suggests replacing our to-do lists with a single daily intention:

“Today I want to grow into the best human being I can be… I want to learn as much as I can and grow as much as I can with whatever comes my way.”

What a beautiful shift in mindset. When we focus on growth rather than achievement, every day has the potential to be successful—regardless of what does or doesn’t happen.

We may not have control over what life throws at us, but we do have control over how we respond. And that’s where true success lives. It doesn’t mean we need perfect responses. Growth is messy. But every choice, every moment, is an opportunity to practice.

So, I invite you to broaden your definition of success. You don’t need to ditch your to-do list entirely—but perhaps give equal attention to a “to-be” list. At the end of the day, take a moment to reflect:

• Did I learn something today?

• Was I kind?

• Did I resist negativity?

• Did I express gratitude?

• Did I listen deeply?

• Did I make someone smile?

If you answered “yes” to even one of those questions, then you succeeded.

Notice your growth. Celebrate your small wins. Build on them.

A successful life is made up of successful moments. It’s not a far-off destination—it’s something we create, experience, and choose every day.

Begin now.